Humanity
by loveinchaos
Summary: Beast Boy has known Raven as so kind and strong and sad. But not so much anymore, she's been with her new Boyfriend. HE lets her be needy and weak in front of him,for a change, and he makes her SO happy. And Beast boy is just ABSOLUTLY SICK OF IT. Companion piece: Incidents at midnight. Re-edited.
1. seeking advice

...vFLASHBACKv... 

Fear. Delicious. Not so much a specific scent like any food he'd dare remember but more because it was a promise.

The scent grew stronger and he felt muscles coil mid bound so he would land as silently as his shadow. His eyes focused on nothing but the prey. They were out of breath, sweating, and their heart was beating a mile a minute. He couldn't ask for a better victim, a better promise. He could hear their gasps and squeals of horror as he got closer and closer. At last he leapt and pinned his victim to the ground. He dug his claws into their skin, feeling it pierce and feeling the silent screams of pain that came with it. He howled proudly as his prey lay helpless beneath him.

He was sounding parts of his nature that were deeper than he could ever explain when he wasn't here, in the middle of it. He howled for his life and for the other's death, and for his possession of its very life. He howled to savor the feelings of a wild king. Then he claimed the promise and all its glory. He opened his maw wide and went right for the throat.

Beast Boy bolted up out of bed and promptly hit his head against the bedside lamp. He cradled his head in both hands as he looked around. His bedroom was dark and quiet, as it usually was at three in the morning. He was soaked with perspiration. His heart was racing so quickly it hurt and he felt a feverish thrill. He ran his tongue over his fangs, they hadn't felt the tearing flesh and ached with the need.

He sighed and slumped forward, running his fingers through his thick shock of fur. He then rubbed his tired eyes and threw his damp blankets off. And froze, I don't have fur right now… that was my hair.  
>^...in the present...^<p>

He stopped retelling his story there. After that he had run into Raven and... He didn't want to share that part of his night, it was precious. He looked up at the rest of the team. They were in the war room. But during peaceful times it was really just a conference room for the team. This wasn't the most important issue that they needed to work on but anything that counted as a family issue was said here.

"You have dreams where you're hunting?" asked Cyborg. "A dream you can analyze. In your dreams are you a human or an animal? And what is your prey? "  
>"I'm in an animal form, but I'm not really sure which one. All I know is that I have claws and fangs. As for prey," Beast Boy admitted. "No clue, 'm not even sure what it looks like because I just smell or sense it while I'm hunting. It doesn't really matter, I guess. "<p>

"Beast Boy, don't you like meat?" Raven asked. To beast boy this seemed to come out of nowhere and he gagged on his own spit in his hurry to answer.

"What? Of course not!" he said. "I'm a veggie-! [Cough] I mean, IMA VEGAN!" it was all a bit embarrassing but he didn't care at the moment whether or not he had drool dripping down his chin. He didn't care until Cyborg rattled across the room like a cell phone on vibrate in attempt to hand his friend a towel while simultaneously holding in his laughter. He finally did get embarrassed but by then Raven had grown too impatient with all this and took the towel first and smothered his face with it. "MmmF!"  
>"Yeah I know your vegan, but you eat meat flavored tofu, correct?" she asked. She then continued to scrub into his face like she was scrubbing at a dirty dish, effectively stifling his next protest to continue her reasoning. "So you must like the taste of meat."<p>

Beast Boy's face was stinging and he growled in the back of his throat. It was quickly choked off by her scent. It was less candle wax today and more of her and her shadows. "Well… yeah, I guess I do like some of that and this…" Beast Boy purred into the cloth, through which he could feel the cool of her hand

Raven started to correct him so he would say "this and that" but saw his eyes weirdly focused on her. She shivered without anything in the room that was colder than her. Unnerved she finally realized how close they were and stepped back. Only Starfire saw this small interaction and thought it strange.

When Raven pulled away so did her scent and Beast Boy's Growl returned to the back of his throat. His boy's pride no longer felt the need to be so honest. "The thought of an animal being slaughtered and served makes me sick. I just like the fake flavoring. Nothing else"

"If I were in your position, I'd feel the same way," said Raven. "I think I do somewhat understand what you're going through."

"What? How?"

"I'm part demon, Beast Boy," she stated, a little annoyed at his shock. "I get demonic urges just like you get primal urges." This she began to carefully explain."I always have this desire to let myself go completely and just do whatever my heart wants, no matter what the consequences are. When I'm really ticked off I fantasize about pulling apart whoever stands in my way. Seeing a natural disaster makes my heart race excitedly for a few seconds until I remember it is a DISASTER. See, we share a parallel state of mind."

"But your primal side came and went, so this is probably much more temporary," she added ruefully. Robin nodded at this and leaned back against the wall as if more distance could actually let him see the bigger picture.

"Maybe because friend beast boy suppresses primal instincts so much they're building up and eating away at your mind of subconscious," said Starfire. Robin nodded.  
>"Could it be the source? Could it be your primal side longing to be released again?" asked Cyborg. <p>

"I hope not," said Beast Boy. "But I doubt it."  
>"Why is that?" asked a surprised Starfire.<br>"I don't know … it feels different, really"

That's not very comforting. Maybe this time it's more psychological instead of instinctual," said Raven. Robin nodded at this.  
>"Could be," said Cyborg, "Maybe you should talk to a pro, B."<br>Beast Boy jerked his head away from Raven to glare at his best friend. Boy's pride and growl mixing in protest he looked around to see EVERYONE was considering it. "A shrink, guys? REALLY?"

"it matters not how it sounds, as long as it helps," Starfire replied. Robin nodded.

"Would you stop nodding along and say something?" snapped beast boy to robin.  
>Robin raised an eyebrow now," Frankly, a psychologist would be a huge security concern. It would be an ideal way to earn our trust or learn our weaknesses. But your health is top priority. But I think you are still sound of mind enough to decide if you need outside help for yourself." <p>

"Well then I don't" he made steady eye contact with the rest of his family," and I am actually real sure of this. Whatever happens next is something I need to understand. Some average Joe shrink won't help."  
>Robin nodded again.<br>Raven raised his eyebrow.  
>And Cyborg shrugged.<br>As an afterthought Starfire mentioned, "Maybe act on your instincts a bit. That may release that pressure of steam."  
>"Starfire, you have no idea what kind of instincts we're talking about, here," said Beast Boy. "I mean, I have the desire and needs of every animal! Sometimes I growl and roar when I'm threatened, I have this desperate need to mark my territory, and don't even get me started on the Harvest moon that pushes me into heat! How can I just stop suppressing all of that after I've spent so much time controlling them? Or do you want me to make a bunch of quarter human bunny children?"<p>

"It was just a suggestion," added Robin quickly, unnerved by the idea of beast bunnies even as he smiled at the sarcasm. That he sarcasm meant B had at least cheered up. Cyborg started wondering out loud what little beast bunnies could do for the team and robin countered with all of the dangerous "what ifs". They both looked back at beast boy one last time before seriously debating the topic as they left the room. Following, Starfire commented about how adorable mutant bunnies might be, and agreed with one than the other.  
>Raven was following them out. But she would take the precious scent with her. He couldn't let her just leave. "Do you ever have dreams like I do?" he blurted out.<br>"Sometimes," she said. "Sometimes I imagine I'm terrorizing people and ...it feels great, and the power high is priceless, preciose. And it's so great until I wake up…"  
>"Does anything help you to stop having those dreams?" he asked.<p>

"Yes," she said as she turned back around to face him. Her iris seemed to catch the light just enough to reflect some red. But there was almost nothing red in the room. "The next day I let myself in your games of Stankball and take my bloodthirsty side out on you and Cyborg." She said with a vicious smirk that was just a little too toothy. He joyfully smiled back with a little too much fang and saliva. And once again the teens returned to themselves and broke eye contact. They chatted idly as they walked out into the light pretending neither of them had slipped in their humanity.


	2. she owned him

A voice came from the shadows of the hallway. "Going out for a midnight stroll, Beast Boy?" Beast Boy, who was just now crossing the threshold of the tower, turned towards her.

He stepped torward her, "Rae…"

Had she been waiting for him? She stepped out of the shadows her dark blue cloak seemed even darker as it was offset by the shine of silver. The silver of the bracelet Jason had bought her.

The muscles in his neck stiffened with the unpleasant reminder. His fangs began to ache. He had been grinding them lately.

"Are you talking to me?" he asked with a mechanic politeness.

"Who else would I be talking to?" she asked, stepping closer. Her eyes were stormy with worry.

"Well, you could have been on the phone," he said, taking a step back, "with that boyfriend of yours. And I am, as you put it, 'not to meddle in your affairs." The door was re-opened. He could feel the voices of the night calling to his back. Listening to the restrained and sleepy murmurs of the trampled forest that clung to the edge of Jump City, Beast Boy turned toward the calls of wild animals. Maybe if he could join them, just for a bit. He only made it one step-

"Garfield." Curse **that** voice. "It's not safe."

He felt caught between two very queer energies. The itch to rebel against the rules and defy the Titan protocol vs. the anxious sexual tension that wanted to follow Raven and be around that scent even though he knew he wouldn't get laid. Yeesh, it would be simpler to join the wolves. Maybe make some quarter human bunny babies.

"Come back inside. Please." His fantasy of running wild and free crumbled. He whined a bit as he followed her back up. Raven owned him, though she didn't know it. Well… she had said please.

…

"How'd you know? That I would be leaving tonight? Rea," he kept his eyes glued to the table. The temptation of being the only two people awake was horrible. This must be what it was like to be a recovering alcoholic.

Something about the way he asked his question bugged her but she answered anyway. "I don't usually pry into your minds as I want to give all of you privacy but, you are talking to an emotional empath. Sometimes, I can't help it." Sighing, she placed the cup down on the sink counter and turned to face him. She wasn't sure that it was a good or bad thing for her to have slipped self control but it had happened and she had acted on it. There was nothing to regret and she shouldn't feel guilty. She did though. "Do you wish to talk about your latest dream?" she offered as she neared the table, hesitant.

"Talk? You mean, with you?" that would be so dangerous. But, maybe that could quench his thirst. Maybe if he could use the time to persuade her to end her relations with Jason. Just a few hours where she would finally be his, maybe that's all he really needed. Yeah …That Would Be So Dangerous.

His silence was unnatural for him and unnerving for her. "Look, Beast boy," she suddenly snapped, seeming to lose the patience she always had little of. "This is about YOUR mental health and is difficult enough as it is," she leaned in so he had no choice but to look her in the eye, "Why are you making it so much harder?"

Beast boy gave her a look of mild shock. She had leaned in so close to him that her scent rolled off her in waves and attacked his senses. Craving stirred inside him and his look changed to that of horror as he registered the many primitive impulses buzzing in his mind. Her feet grew talons and dug themselves into the carpet.

Raven felt a strong wave of something. Something unknown. But she did identify the horror. She actually turned around to see if some gruesome creature had come out of the wall behind her. He reached both hands out to grasp her hair, pull her head back toward him. Instead, he seized control and brought his hand slamming onto the table. Raven jumped at the sudden sound and instinctively shrank back from Beast boy with a look of fear. His claws started to scratch and puncture the wood like it had longed to do so to her skin. He looked up at her, ashamed. She felt the possessive intent of his emotions evaporate into mournful guilt.

She was shaken, but to show it would only make him feel guiltier. She folded her hands over her chest and gave him a stern look.

"I'm sorry," he finally replied in a low voice. "I've just been... out of it, lately."

"No kidding." She wanted to scold him. It was late and would probably wake everyone up, but at least that would have felt normal. Instead she looked him square in the eye. "I know, you've been under a lot of stress and everything, but don't forget that you still have us."

Beast boy smiled and nodded. "I know," he looked down at the table as he lied. "I just forgot." He smiled and nodded again but his eyes were glued on the wall behind her. His claws clicked against each other nervously. She reached across to pat him on the shoulder but fresh from another dream he couldn't handle it.

"Well, GOODNIGHT!" he chirped and a green wolf dashed out of the room.

Raven couldn't say anything, he was gone so fast. She turned around to see the wall he had been so keen on that night. She leaned back and tapped her nails on the table. She felt like she had come close; so close to figuring out what was wrong with him.

"I'm missing something." She said to no one, thru gritted teeth.


	3. he needs a favor

"I told you, maybe Wednesday," Raven said into the phone. "Well then we'll just move it then…ok… Listen, Jason, I need to go to-…wha?… yeah?... oh, I'm sorry about that…oh…so?…oh!... I don't know… it doesn't look possible…Listen, Jason…

Raven suddenly felt an intense emotional fluctuation and turned around. Beast Boy had arrived in the common room and was blinking in the unexpected light. He squinted a little. And he as if to stop a sneeze he sniffed. Then suddenly his head snapped in her direction. He was looking directly at her but his eyes were still dilating. Even blinded he could find her. A chill went up her spine. This talent was normally a boon to the team. An admirable tool, but not just now. Not when he was smiling at her like that.

His vision cleared. He saw her curled up on the couch with her phone in hand. Her face was draining of color. Oh no. he had done something again hadn't he? And then he realized that from her perspective she saw him, standing in a doorway in only his boxers. Again. He froze. Without his approval Beast Boy felt his cheeks burn.

The two might have stared at each other like that if a static voice hadn't snapped them both out of it.

"Raven, Dear, are you still there?" Raven hurried to lower the volume of the cellphone.

Mercifully for Beast Boy, Raven just turned back around. He decided to quickly get a snack and then get the hell out of there.

Jason, I really have to go to bed… no, I have an early morning training… Okay, I'll talk to them about it tomorrow… ok… yes…Goodnight." She turned the phone off and he could hear her sigh. "Are you seriously hungry again?"

Beast Boy, who was now balancing 3 cans of beans in one hand, turned towards her. At least standing behind the kitchen island they could pretend he was wearing pants. "Are you talking to me?" he asked.

"Who else would I be talking to?" she asked, then frowned in worry. "Were you playing games so long you forgot to eat?"

Oops. Busted. Change the subject. "Hey, do we really have early morning training?"

"Oh. Uh, no." she admitted a little guiltily.

Beast Boy smiled. Jackpot. "I could've sworn I heard you tell – Jason, was it? - that we did."

"Eavesdropping on my conversation?"

He put on his most innocent smile and she snorted.

"Well, yes. His name IS Jason. And I told him that because if I hadn't he wouldn't have let me go." she said.

"This Jason is sort of a-" Beast Boy turned into a chattering chimpanzee for a moment, "-isn't he?"

Raven just raised an eyebrow at his antics. "Yes," said Raven. "But I don't mind."

"Hey! You say that I talk all the time and you hate it!" he said. "How come it's different for him?"

"Because he talks about intelligent things rather than the immature rabble of tofu, jokes, and zombies," said Raven with a slight roll of her eyes. She started to smile, though.

"Oh… immature." said Beast Boy, his ears lowering. He hadn't noticed the smile. Then he pretended he had felt nothing. Strolling out the door "Well have fun on your date next Wednesday!"

"Wait, Beast Boy!"

He froze in a comical position with one foot raised in front of him dramatically. "Yeees Raven?" he said with an enormous show smile.

"I need to ask you a favor." She bit her lip as soon as she said it.

Wondering why she seemed so uncertain he replied in his squeakiest, fussiest voice,"Of course! Of course! Anything!"

Beast boy was hamming it up. Reshuffling his feet to face her and straitening himself out as if he was a fussy butler awaiting orders.

Ravens lips quirked. "okay. So it's like this, Jason has an event."

"Uhg! Seriously?!"

Taken aback, "What?"

Being Very Dramatic, "you finally ask me a favor, and it's for your boyfriend?"

Deciding that he's just hamming it up again, "Will you shut up for a second and listen?"

He crosses his arms, actually mad. But he knows that whatever she asks, he's gonna do it. Growling a bit Beast Boy says, "O.K. What Is It?"

What could this Jason possibly want? He already had HER afterall…


	4. hot headed confession

Beastboy winced as Raven sat him down. He shuddered involuntarily. Teleporting with Raven always left a slight chill in his bones. Like her beloved shadows had passed through him while he had been pulled through them.

"YOU IDIOT."

Still shaking off the chills, his teeth chattered as he whined, "He called you evil. I had to do something."

Raven's expression darkened slightly, as she pressed her lightly glowing hands to his face. He felt the pain from the fistfight lessening as her powers went to work. "After the incident with Trigon, a lot of people feel that way. You can't just punch everyone who disagrees with us IN THE FACE."

Beast boy grinned, which hurt. Beast boy rubbed his face, hoping to soothe the remaining ache. Raven's telekinesis allowed healing from the inside. It was truly an amazing talent, but not exactly perfect.

"He looked as if he was about to punch You! Plus there was definitely something weird about him. He made it sound like you don't deserve to be a Titan. I don't know; he was just too weird. I think he was crazy."

"He was probably a little bit drunk! A lot of people were. Let me remind you, we were at a charity dinner! You're lucky we could teleport away before you messed up the entire gathering. Thank god the proceeds were from the ticket sales. At least, the programs will still get the money. But talk about Inappropriate!" Raven would have said more but she needed a break from scolding him to concentrate. She held Beast boy's sprained wrist gingerly as she focused on the damaged ligaments.

Making use of her temporary need to be silent, Beast boy decided that the best defense was a good offense. "What was JASON doing when I was getting my butt kicked? He was there too; he should have helped out!"

"Jason would never have caused all this trouble! He wouldn't have turned a comment into a fist fight!"

"Where Was He? Cuz you sure do love to talk about him, Rae- But I was the one who was RIGHT THERE!"

There was some sort of hot headed love confession buried in there but Raven managed not to hear it. The truth about Jason was too distracting.

In all honesty, while Raven, Beast Boy, Jinx, and the Drunkard had been getting into a fight, Jason had been on the other side of the room. It hadn't been a very large room but he hadn't noticed a thing. He had been talking to Starfire.

No, he'd been hitting on Starfire. No, that couldn't be right. And right now wasn't the right time to think about it.

"He was distracted... I don't know, maybe because you just immediately jumped in and hit the guy. Hold still, your wrist isn't done yet."

"Whatever," he scoffed at her defense of her boyfriend.

"It's not whatever, do not do that! You can be such an impulsive moron sometimes."

Beastboy was steamed. He glared at the ceiling only to realize that he didn't recognize it. The only light was that of Raven's glowing hands. "Where are we? I know you didn't drag me all the way back to the Tower."

Raven shook her head. "No, I wouldn't have the energy to heal you if I had done that. We're just in our limo."

"Anyway Raven, you have to admit that he had it coming. He shouldn't talk about you that way, you've helped to save the world!" Beast boy moved his stiff wrist around, testing it. It was sore, of course, but Raven had helped tremendously.

Raven lifted Beastboy's shirt. Raven did a double take when she saw his bare skin. The mark on his ribs was already a dark bruise. There were old scars all over his body. That plus his insane amount of muscles produced an image that was so raw. She swallowed dryly. Even if he wasn't strong by human standards his constant changes into animals had made his body so defined.

"What's wrong? Is it really bad?" She had been staring at him too long.

"No."

She pressed her hands to him once again, hoping to ease the pain and ignore the tension.

No, there is no sexual tension. It's all in your mind. Focus.

"It's nice of you to try to defend my honor, Beast boy. It's... sweet, in a way. Still, he wasn't exactly a small man, and you aren't the best fist fighter in the world."

"WHATEVER, I don't care." She rolled her eyes at him and was about to protest when he clamped his uninjured hand over her mouth. "Rachel Roth, take me seriously for once… I would do that again, maybe a million times over again. I am not EVER going to sit back and let someone talk down to you. Plus, you make yourself out to be indifferent while really you get hurt by all this hater talk AND ITS STUPID. Don't make that face- I'm not done yet! You will have to hear a lot of crap from a lot of people like that. But in reality, YOU are the MOST heroic people I know. Anyone who says differently NEEDS to have some sense knocked into them. AND if I hear you AGREE with any of it! S0 HELP ME, I WILL KNOCK SENSE INTO YOU TOO!"

The silence that filled the room was deafening. Raven was flooded with a confused batch of emotions and she was at a complete loss for where all that even came from. Beast boy was inwardly kicking himself and he was at a complete loss for what had let him say all that. She stared at him. Beast boy grew stiff in the silence and started counting the seconds he should maybe wait to break the silence. When he got to 4 though, Raven hugged him.

"Thanks," she whispered. She really held on to him, as though he was the only thing keeping her on earth. He tried not to be awkward. So he hugged her back. But this brought up the issue of whether or not he could cop a feel.

This mental debate was brought short when he felt wetness on his shoulder. Finally tuning in to her mood, he focused on holding her. She cried only little bit. Still, neither of them would ever admit it to anyone. But it was nice that for once, being a little emotional was ok.

She did accidentally levitate them both until their heads hit the ceiling. But BB just held onto her and pretended it was all normal. He pushed upward against the limo ceiling so they were floating in the middle of the limo instead of bumping into it.

She pulled away and (still floating) they smiled at each other. "Thanks."

"Sure, Rae."

"No, REALLY."

"You're welcome, Rae. But…"

She started to bring them back down. Embarrassed now she asked, "What?"

He smiled ear to ear, "I would have clocked the guy even if you weren't gonna thank me for it."

She snorted and then punched him.

"Ow! Wounded patient here!"

She looked concerned for a minute before laughing outright and punching him even harder. That time it did hurt. But that time Beast Boy didn't complain. She was laughing. What else could possibly matter?


End file.
